Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Aralia - FAIL


I fondly called it my giraffe plant. Mostly because, if I had a desktop sized giraffe - you know a cubicle pet - it would love to eat this plant. It was odd and tall with tufts of crinkly leaves. It filled this tall empty space on top of my 2 drawer filing cabinet just perfectly.

I even covered the soil with moss to keep it nice and moist. But then I killed it. Well, it's not quite dead yet, but it sure isn't happy like the guy on the gurney in Monty Python.

I've had it for about 3 years I would say. I bought it for a steal at the wholesale florist because I had never seen one like it. My coworker pick one up as well, but hers died in the first 6 months, so I guess mine wasn't terrible.

The little tag said Aralia and a wiki search tells me there are crap loads of different varieties, but most of them live in the woodlands. I guess my office wasn't woodland enough. Since these pictures, the one lone tuft has fallen off.

Heartless bitch that I am, I went out and bought replacement plants at IKEA and gave it's spot to a cheap and tawdry little money plant in a $2.99 white ceramic pot. I know, that's no way to remember my cubicle giraffe's favorite food source, but I am a sucker for cheap plants.

So, it's fate is sealed. I moved my embarrassing failure home to convalesce on my condo porch. There are no leaves, just tall shameful sticks waiting to be put out of their misery. We will see if it comes alive again, or just freezes it's little ass off out there.

One a side note: IKEA has a super cool plant that I want. It's a coconut palm, about 4' tall. The best part is that it's just a whole coconut on it's side in a pot of dirt and it has sprouted a tree. It looks awesome, but at $29.99, I don't think it will get a home with me.

See, I've already forgotten my failure and moved on to the bright and shiny new plants. I have learned nothing.